4 years ago, my name finally came to the top of the allotment waiting list. It was a mess of cooch grass, weeds and dumped bits and pieces. I feel in love with it straight away, and it quickly be-came my happy place. It has been hard work, frustrating at times and mud under the fingernails and osteopathy are not an ideal combination. As we went into the first lockdown of 2020 it really kept me going and became a place that was essential for my wellbeing. I had more time on my hands than I have had in many years but no seedlings or plants and no option to by any. I decided that it was time to put the small propagator that I had bought 2 years ago into operation. I bought a selection of seeds online and set to work. Choosing the seeds was a combination of things I like to grow, what was available and wishful thinking.

Seeds were sown and I waited, I have a very small but much appreciated garden and really en-joyed using the space for sowing seeds potting on, and “designing” what was going where. It was a place of calm and when the world felt chaotic and uncertain. Having the time to think about the layout of beds helped to keep me focused and grounded, digging and weeding took on a new zeal as it was time out of the house when there was very little opportunity to do much else apart from work. In years gone when time was short; I have bought what I can get my hands from garden centres and shops to plant out so quite haphazard about things. Last year I thought more about colour, variety and protecting my seedlings and plants from foe like foxes, slugs, snails, and pigeons (more on that later). Checking my plants became a daily relaxing ritual. Go-ing to the allotment most days became my regular exercise, quietly whiling away the hour(s) out-doors and feeling relaxed whilst forgetting albeit temporarily about the pandemic was blissful. Our allotment is not pretty, it’s my higgledy piggledy happy place and its design is ever changing and forces me to accept what I cannot change (the elements, pests, dud seeds) and keep trying new things.


Yinka runs her osteopathic clinic from her home in Brixton and online yoga classes. Visit her website at https://www.holmewoodosteopathicpractice.co.uk/ and find her on instagram @theosteopathyogi

I love being a mother. I love having that relationship with my son. I love being around him, I love watching him grow, I love sharing his important moments and hearing him find himself and his passions. I love snuggling him to sleep and being woken by him in the morning (less so at 4am). I love the richness he brings to my life and the ways that relationship pushes me to grow and be a better person.
 
It is also challenging, in particular the expectations I realise I have of myself around what it means to be a mum and who else I am ‘allowed’ to be at the same time. I find the juggling is difficult and varied and I have had to work to create self care time as I wrote about in a Shame and Self Care blog. I am still working hard to hold onto myself as a broad, multifaceted creature and realise how easy it is to slip back into the assumption that being a ‘good’ mother is synonymous with total self sacrifice. These are my expectations on myself and that I see in mothers around me, which must come from the world and society in which we were raised.
 
Maternal mental health is important for our children’s mental health and for our society at large. And I believe it is a challenge to all mothers to maintain mental health. We have a constant need to juggle and our brains and bodies are expected to jump in all directions often simultaneously. We are often tired and overstretched and I think our society has a long way to go to accommodate flourishing mental health for us. 
 
I love Caitlin Moran’s insight into how we are forever changed on a chemical level by motherhood: 
“No one really talks about the chemical elements of parenting but when you think about it, this is what underpins everything. Humans are essentially bags of chemicals We choose our mate on their smell, their hormones subliminally whispering to us in a neanderthal grunt ‘this man make good baby with you’ then when a woman gets pregnant, what is created in her uterus is essentially a living hormonal implant emitting random amounts of fuck knows what into her system and rewiring her entire body and brain in a massive hormonal pyroclustic blast that she never fully recovers from” (Caitlin Moran in More Than a Woman)
 
Here are my fantasies of how a shift in our expectations could come about that might better support maternal mental health:
What if…
...It was widely understood and accepted by society that pregnant women are going through an immense change that involves so much loss as well as gain. That there is much to be grieved in becoming a mother - a sense of self, alone time, sleep, some friendships, an ability to wholly commit to something else, our bodies as they were, our attitudes as they were - everything as it was!
 
...we recognised openly that ‘tired and hormonal’ can really mean ‘can barely lift myself off the chair and feel like my brain is exploding’ and realised that those things shouldn’t be ignored just because they are common, that in fact this is womanhood in all its glorious colours, a rainbow to be celebrated and supported.
 
...our society recognised the value in rest and supporting mothers to get rest that they need from the early weeks of pregnancy through to their children leaving home, that work breaks for naps were a given and it was built into our expectations that we are all healthier and happier when well rested.
 
…our government understood ’supporting childcare needs’ less as simply making the age for group child care lower and more the benefits to our future society of child care with a much lower adult to child ratio
 
...we gave more space to the fact that bringing a child into a relationship utterly changes the relationship and can often leave the person who didn’t give birth feeling left out so that couples finding themselves in this difficult place don’t feel bad or wrong and instead know this is their rites of passage to get through.
 
...we allowed women to work and be a primary carer by helping support the caring part better, that the person paid to look after the child can feasibly be the one who loves them best and that we didn’t feel it was a constant sacrifice between our work passions and our family as to who gets more of our time and energy.
 
...we celebrated the changes in women’s bodies that come with pregnancy, birth, breastfeeding, getting older and the menopause and let go of any expectation or idealisation of ‘back to a pre-pregnancy body’ - what if we could celebrate every stage of women’s bodies....
 
...it was widely understood that Feminism doesn't mean ignoring biology but restructuring society so that we can accommodate everyone fairly rather than simply ‘letting’ women do more and more things.
 
...things that strengthen our bodies, minds and spirits like yoga, mediation, therapies and walking were valued to such a degree that we assumed it was part of our every day like eating and washing.
 
...we understood that you cannot separate the physical from the mental or emotional and that our mental health is always going to be affected by things that affect our bodies, like pregnancy and motherhood.
 
The optimist in me sees some steps in some of these directions and is hopeful that society is changing, however incrementally. At the heart of any of this change is kindness and compassion - things that we so value in the act of mothering that surely should be so highly valued in how we treat our mothers in society.
 

In 1982, the International Dance Day was first celebrated marking the birthday of Jean-Georges Noverre (1727-1810), the creator of modern ballet. International Dance Day was started to spread the message of the benefits of dance, celebrate dance and bring people together.

The benefits of dance, to me, are endless. It is physically invigorating, allows creativity to blossom and encourages a social atmosphere. For me, dance is therapy. There is a sense of letting go, of releasing and feeling lighter in yourself. It is a full
body experience, including the mind and spirit. If you’re feeling a bit stressed or a bit stuck in a routine, I highly encourage you to put on some music and let your body follow it. Most likely you will feel a little self-conscious in yourself at first, and it will
feel hard to find the first ‘move’. Don’t worry about moves or steps, just start off by swaying a little to the music and let your body follow naturally in the flow of movement. It doesn’t have to be a spectacular ‘dance’, we are just dancing.

As a professional dancer, a lot of my life is consumed by dance. Maintaining technique and broadening my versatility of styles is something that I work on every day. When you’re a dancer by trade, you’re a dancer in life. This day is a celebration for those who see the value and importance of the art form ‘dance’, and acts as a wake up call for governments, politicians and institutions which have not yet recognised its value to the people and to the individual.

The pandemic has hit all of us hard, but especially the dance and theatre industry. We have not been allowed to perform for over a year now. For some, it has been too much and artists and friends have already started pursuing other careers. But for those that have remained through it all, I have seen the sheer guts and resilience of dancers and artists, fighting for their artistry and freedom to dance. Dancing in living rooms, bedrooms, kitchens, gardens, and zooming in to classes from all over the
world because we simply can’t stop.

We can’t stop because dancing feels good! I believe there’s a dance style out there for everyone and encourage you to find yours. Here’s a ‘short’ list: ballet, jazz, modern, tap, contemporary, swing, lindy hop, hip hop, jive, ballroom, salsa, samba, street jazz, krumping. Look and see what there is in your local area, classes will be back in the studio from 17th May!

And when you’ve started your new dance hobby, look after your body by coming to see me at West Norwood Therapies for a sports massage! I absolutely love how being a dancer informs my work as a massage therapist. I'm particularly interested in improving clients’ range of movement and flexibility to give them freedom in their bodies.

Stress is the body's reaction to feeling threatened or under pressure.  It affects everyone, of all ages, in different ways and is an unavoidable part of life.  According to the Mental health Foundation 74% of UK adults have felt so stressed at some point over the last year they felt overwhelmed or unable to cope.

When we think of the word stress it usually comes with a negative bias, however, stress isn’t always a bad thing.  It makes me think of the Goldilocks Principle: too hot, too cold and just right…

• Too much stress can have negative consequences on our health,
• Too little stress can lead to lethargy and lack of motivation,
• However the right amount of acute stress (ie short-term) can help to focus and reach an optimal level of alertness and cognitive performance. 

 
Eustress is defined as a positive form of stress.  It has a beneficial effect on health, motivation, performance, and emotional well-being.  It is perceived as being within our coping abilities, feels exciting and is short-term.
 
Distress is defined as a negative form of stress having a detrimental impact on health and wellbeing.  It triggers feelings of anxiety and overwhelm, decreases focus and motivation, contributes to mental and physical problems and can be both short and long-term.
 
It is interesting that both expressions, eustress and distress, stem from the body’s primal reaction to stress: the Fight or Flight Response.  Let’s explore this a little further…
 
The Autonomic Nervous System (ANS) is the involuntary part of the Nervous System that regulates processes in the body that we cannot consciously influence, including: respiration, heart rate, blood pressure, digestion, metabolism, sexual response, body temperature, electrolyte balance, urination and defecation.  The ANS is constantly receiving information about the body and its external environment.  It sends signals from the brain and passes them on to the body and also send signals from the body to the brain via neurotransmitters. 
 
The ANS has two main divisions:
 
Sympathetic Nervous System (SNS) aka Fight or Flight.
The SNS enhances voluntary muscle activity while shutting down all non-essential functions (ie: digestion, urination).  It releases a combination of hormones and chemicals including epinephrine, cortisol and norepinephrine to increase the heart rate, blood pressure and respiration, blood is diverted to the muscles, the body releases stored energy, muscular strength is increased, pupils dilate, and palms sweat.
 
Parasympathetic Nervous System (PNS) aka Rest, Digest, Repair
The PNS role is to conserve and restore.  It is responsible for the bodily functions when we are at rest, slowing the heart rate and respiration, decreasing blood pressure, increasing digestion, stimulates normal peristaltic smooth muscle movement of the intestines, and increases urination.
 
The two divisions work together to ensure that the body responds appropriately to different situations. 
 
Recognising stress:

Acute vs Chronic Stress
 
The body is able to cope with acute, short-term stress, it is what has kept humankind alive for millions and millions of years.  If we think back to our pre-historic ancestors, a classic case of a Fight-or-Flight response for a caveman would be to the imminent physical danger of sabre-toothed tiger! The stress response was triggered as a means of survival.  Once the threat has gone it takes between 20 to 30 minutes for the body to return to its pre-arousal levels.
 
In our modern world a physical fight-or-flight response can happen if jumping out the way of an oncoming vehicle or encountering a growling dog when out for a walk.  We also experience the same chemical response to situational stresses:  managing work commitments, juggling personal, family and friend’s needs, financial concerns, big life events, health etc….  Sometimes, the fight-or-flight response is overactive and the body stays in a prolonged and consistent state of stress.
 
Chronic stress happens when the body is constantly reacting to stress and is not fully able to recover.  Prolonged exposure to fight or flight responses (high cortisol, epinephrine and norepinephrine) take their toll on the body and can lead to a number of serious problems, including: burn-out, exhaustion, lowering immunity and experiencing an increase in colds and infections, gastrointestinal problems, cardiovascular disease, menstruation problems, sexual dysfunction and mental health problems with anxiety, depression and panic attacks and a number of other conditions.
 
What can we do about it?
Stress looks different to each person so it’s really helpful to be aware of your own stress triggers and how you respond to them.  Knowing and recognising your own triggers and behaviours is really powerful so you are able to identify them as they happen, by doing so you can then choose how you want to respond in that moment.
How can I help myself?

• Talking – whether to a psychologist, friend or family member talking to someone you trust can be really helpful to process the stress.
• Breathing Exercises – highly effective for calming the body as well as stimulating the vegus nerve that is key for regulating the parasympathetic nervous system: rest, digest, repair.
• Mindful Movement – moving your body through dance, yoga, qigong etc.. can help the body move and release energy, connecting breath to movement to help soothe the nervous system.
• Meditation – there are a number of different meditation techniques and not all involve sitting still.  Being able to observe ones thoughts without responding to each one will in turn help to calm the mind and body.
• Nature – taking time out to be in nature helps us to feel connected, listening to the sound of birds singing, noticing everything starting to bloom in Spring has a very grounding and inspiring effect.

 
 References:
The Autonomic Nervous System
https://www.msdmanuals.com/en-gb/home/brain,-spinal-cord,-and-nerve-disorders/autonomic-nervous-system-disorders/overview-of-the-autonomic-nervous-system
Sympathetic Nervous System
https://biologydictionary.net/sympathetic-nervous-system/
Stress Symptoms
https://www.webmd.com/balance/stress-management/stress-symptoms-effects_of-stress-on-the-body
The Stress Response
https://www.visiblebody.com/blog/the-endocrine-system-the-adrenal-glands-and-the-stress-response

Acupuncturist Philippa Summers, who has a special interest in fertility, shares some helpful resources around supporting the often overlooked area of male fertility.

here is a growing movement among men and male fertility specialists to encourage the issue of male fertility into the open, improve awareness and access to help, both specialist and peer support. Prompted by watching a BBC program on male fertility with comedian Rhod Gilbert aimed at opening up the conversation and garnering more support, I have put together some resources. I hope they will be useful to men facing fertility issues, especially if they are feeling isolated and unsure of where to turn. It is also National Infertility Awareness Week.
 
In couples struggling to conceive male factors contribute almost 50% of the time and are often overlooked, especially so when an identifiable contributing issue has been identified in the woman, and this can leave many male issues underdiagnosed and undertreated. It can leave couples struggling often with an over reliance on IVF, which may give you a chance of navigating around a problem but will not rectify an issue, and the emotional, physical and financial burden IVF imposes is comparatively very high.
 
Where male factors have been identified men often bear it alone, harbour their feelings and find it difficult to discuss these very private issues with anyone, including their partner, friends or family.  It can be very isolating, impacting on almost every aspect of their life. It can also be a source of conflict within couples, allowing resentments to build up and adding to the already considerable strain.
 
 
So where can you find support, advice and treatment?
 
Here are some resources that you may find helpful regardless of where you are on your fertility journey, be it starting out and looking for lifestyle advice to help improve sperm and semen, or somewhere down the road and looking at getting investigations, treatment or support. Maybe to begin with you just want to find out that you are not alone and have a chance to listen to other men’s experiences and how they are coping. Be selective so that you are not overwhelmed with information. Included are resources that you can access anonymously or listen to on your own where your privacy is important.
 
Acupuncture
 
A quick mention of the benefits of acupuncture. For men with suboptimal semen parameters acupuncture has been shown to improve the number of normal sperm by improving sperm count, movement and shape – all important factors for improving fertility. Typically the needles are placed in the arms, legs, back and abdomen – never locally!  It is also extremely relaxing and helpful for coping with stress and low mood.
 
Information
 
Fertility Network UK have plenty of good up to date information on all aspects of fertility including male fertility. This is a good starting point for information.
 
The Fertility Podcast website has several episodes that focus on male fertility.  Each podcast is accompanied by notes to help you find those that are likely to be of most interest and relevance to you. They include personal stories, which can help to break down the stigma and isolation, and interviews with male fertility specialists to help understand where different tests and treatments fit in as well, as providing tips for improving your fertility.
 
Specialist Consultations and info
Your GP is usually the first port of call for accessing specialist help. Ask to see a GP in the practice with particular knowledge of male fertility. They should offer you a comprehensive semen analysis and a physical examination with NHS referral to a specialist Andrologist (men’s equivalent of a gynaecologist) where appropriate. This is something you can request giving you the same level of investigation as is routinely offered to women.
 
Prof Sheryl Homa and her team at Andrology Solutions , an HFEA licensed male fertility clinic, have exceptional knowledge of male fertility and provide diagnosis and support for men who are trying to conceive. They are a private clinic and you can self refer. They also have some very useful information on their website.
 
Consultant urologist Jonathan Ramsay is one of the leading experts in male fertility. His website has a wealth of information including the latest advances in research and guidelines. He is available for private consultation.
 
Nutritionist Melanie Brown specialises in helping men and women with fertility, IVF and pregnancy. The right nutrition and supplements provide a solid foundation for overall good health as well as fertility and can make all the difference.
 
Men Only Support Groups
Here are a couple of groups where you can connect with other men going through similar problems.
 
Men’s Fertility Support – a men only Facebook group where men can discuss male fertility issues anonymously. It says IVF/IUI/ICSI but may be broader than this.
 
Fertility Network Uk run a regular Zoom support group for men only (which you can join with your camera off if you wish to remain anonymous). On the linked page it mentions an April date but as of Feb 2021 it is still running.
 
Film, TV and radio programmes
Comedian Rhod Gilbert ‘Stand Up To Fertility’ on BBC2. While undergoing treatment himself comedian Rod Gilbert goes on a frank, revealing and frequently funny journey into the world of male infertility.
 
BBC Radio 4 Benjamin Zephaniah discusses his experience of male infertility with urologist Kevin McEleny, and also talks separately to a couple, Richard and Terri, about their experiences of male fertility issues.
 
Also BBC Radio 4 My Life as a Childless Man.  Writer and actor Rod Silvers talks about his experience and the isolation that it can cause.  He encourages men to find ways to speak about it, something he still finds difficult.
 
LGBTQ+ Community
The Agora Journals podcasts – from The Agora Clinic in Hove. They treat heterosexual couples and solo parents but also have a deeper awareness than many clinics of the needs of the LGBTQ+ community, including people who are transitioning for whom egg and sperm preservation before transition is important.
 
I hope that among this selection you find something that helps you, whatever your circumstances.
 
Very best wishes,
Philippa

A great part of our lifetime is spend sleeping - almost 1/3 provided we get 7-8 hours of it per night. We all know how good sleep is essential for maintaining health and good mood. Sleep plays crucial role in maintaining the nervous system in general and the brain in particular.
 
This week leading up to the vernal equinox marks “World sleep day” highlighting the importance of good sleep. Plenty advice will be published and many top tips for our sweet dreams. Unfortunately, it’s not just what we know or how to do something that makes the difference but what we do with it. Implementing good routines and breaking habits might require a bit of effort but well worth it if the result is sweet sleep.
 
Recently I was chatting with one of my neighbours when mentioning I sleep really well, she made the comment “ability to sleep is like a super power”. That’s crazy, that it would be so unattainable, but my guess it’s like that for many and not being able to switch to sleep is torturous. Yet all that is required is to lay down close your eyes, relax and drift off into sweet slumber.
Falling asleep is remembering a sweet safe place and let go.
 
I have not always had this ease with sleep and have experienced periods of insomnia and disturbing dreaming.
 
Sleep is an elixir for our health and must be important otherwise we might have evolved out of it as it is a quite a vulnerable state. That could explain the division between night owls and early birds. Somebody need to be awake to keep watch.
 
In English we say fall asleep, implying a letting go. We also use the term dropping off, when going to sleep, indicating a motion of fall and that is often how it feels in the mind. Relinquishing control, we trust we will wake up again (on time), that we can safely drop into the unknown, where the subconscious can and will make itself heard and seen in the form of dreams. I find dreaming fascinating, it can help you understand yourself. Dreams can also be very intense, loud, vivid, frightening and disruptive. To ease and begin to understand deeper parts of myself I was encouraged to practice directing the dreams. When becoming aware of dreaming without actually waking up, called lucid dreaming, see if the scene could be changed. I was also encouraged to go back to dreams when waking up. Just dropping back into the dream and create a different outcome, softening and calming the mind and reducing nightmares.
 
Create bedtime routines of preparing for sleep a bit like a plane coming into landing. Slow down and take care of the physical space and body. Set an alarm or reminder an hour or so before bed time to prompt preparing for bed and what needs to be in place for the following day, so that you can actually go to bed when you had intended to be in bed. Allow for some time to settle into bed before lights out.
 
Regulate the intake of stimulants such as food (big meal near bedtime and type of food such spice and garlic), drinks (alcohol, coffee) and visual stimulus such as movie/television/or social media. Read in black and white or give the eyes a rest or listen to an audio book.

Treat your bed and bedroom with respect and as the place for rest. Simple things such as making your bed every day and caring for sheets and bedding. Crisp clean sheet is a simple luxury and  gesture to the importance of sleep. Invest in good quality and look after it, you spend a many hours in bed after all.
 
Keeping a set bedtime but also keeping a wake up time, some say this is more important than regular bedtime to cultivate good regular sleep.
Sleeping in, is not great for establishing healthy sleep or for making up lost hours of sleep. We humans like a rhythm and respond well to it.
 
Soften sensory input from sound and light. Some sounds are hard to regulate when living in a crowded city where people’s life goes on in close proximity. Softening can be achieved in form of textiles, insulation and white noise, like a fan.
When we think of light Black out curtains might be good, but if there is a small gap the light gets focused cutting though like laser beam through the room, so softening by a fabric or shutter that create shaded light. For the content baby or pet or human for that matter this does not matter they have the ability to just switch off and fall sleep. Not disturbed by noise or light.

To switch off we need to relax and that takes practice. Perhaps it shouldn’t be that way. Tiredness and lack of sleep is very common and instead of rest we often end up with a false relaxation, getting stuck watching television or searching the internet, still feeding sensory input through our eyes and stimulating the brain.

If the mind is playing tricks and it’s hard to relax try to soothe it. Breathing equally 6s in 6s out coming into an optimal rhythm for heart and brain. To this add colour going though the alphabet backwards. Colour almost rainbow but going red, orange, yellow, green, sky blue, dark blue, violet, purple, black night sky with stars and then clear light. Big letters tuning small. Big red A turning small, big orange B turning small and so on.
 
For best quality of sleep you need to breath through your nose. Snoring is not just disrupting to your bedroom companion is also disruptive to the snorer. The struggle to get oxygen into the system will wake you repeatedly. There is a simple solution to this. Just put a latch on your mouth encouraging the nasal solution when looking for air. The latch - small piece of tape. I thought it absolutely mad when I first heard of it, but a month later I am kind of hooked. I do waking up a lot clearer in mind than I used to, no brain fog and no trips to the loo in the night.

Happy sleeping zzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

 When I was offered the chance to write a blog about National Bed Month I jumped at it. You mean there's actually a recognised and dedicated month to staying in bed? Ok so I've probably spent way more than a month in my bed during lockdown but now I don't even have to feel guilty about it. Fantastic!  But...on further study I find, no, it's not a celebration of staying in bed, it's about the importance of sleep.  Yawn... As my colleague Erika is already writing a blog about just that, I thought, hey! You know what? I actually want to celebrate bed and all things beddie.  A bed's not just for sleeping, it's for so much more * see footnote.
 
Work - Since March of last year bed has become one of the favourite places to work.  
So as we are spending more and more time in our single, double, King, Queen or super King work spaces, we must ensure to look after our bodies and our environment. If you are determined to work from your bed, although it's not ideal, it's the reality for many people therefore here are some tips to make your desk nest safe and comfortable.
 
Posture and pillow arrangement - Try to sit in the most upright position possible, with a firm pillow in the small of your back and one or two more for your mid and upper back. You may find a plump pillow under the knees also helpful.

A pillow or tray of some description may assist laptop position (and mouse, phone etc).
Try to make sure your shoulders are relaxed and down while hammering at the keys.
Drinks of any kind should remain on the bedside table in case of spillage over laptop and phone.
 
Alternative working positions.  
1. Sit cross legged on the bed, back straight, computer on pillow on lap. 

2. Sit cross legged on floor (with or without pillow), computer on end of bed (only if bed is at a reasonable height for this)

3. Childs pose (see below) on bed with laptop at end of outstretched arms. This position should only be held for short periods of time and definitely not for Zoom meetings.

Clothing.
Wear something loose and comfortable. 
 
Cotton or silk are preferable as man-made fibres may produce sweating and overheating after 15 mins or so of being in the same position. Note: if you start to feel uncomfortable and are sweating profusely this may be due to the heat of your hot water bottle (or hottie bottie as my Mum calls them) so kick it out of the end of the bed before you pass out. NB. In the event of a temperature of over 38 degrees centigrade or above after 10 minutes of removing HWB please seek medical help.
 
If you have poor circulation and typing makes your fingers cold and numb, try wearing fingerless gloves. If this doesn't work try rubbing your hands together vigorously or warm them in a sink of warm water.  If this is happening frequently and you are concerned, check out this NHS page about  Reynauld's  .
 
Take regular breaks after 45 mins to get more water, go to the loo and don't forget to...
 
Stretch - get out of bed (I know. It can be a struggle) to give your neck and shoulders some movement. 
Bend head from side to side, flex it forward and extend it back then rotate from left to right (repeat 5 times). Hunch shoulders up to your ears and drop. repeat 3 times.
 
Get back on the bed... phew... 
Hip flexors will get short and tight sitting for extended periods of time especially the  Rectus Femoris which is the quadriceps muscle that crosses your hip joint. Lie on your side (having removed aforementioned tray/laptop) bend both knees, then reach behind you and grab the ankle/calf nearest the ceiling and stretch your foot behind you towards your bottom, keeping your hips level. Hold stretch for 15-20 seconds and repeat on other side. 
 
The psoas muscle is also a major hip flexor. For this,  lie on your back very close to the edge of your bed, bend the knee furthest away from the edge and rest  your foot on the bed, let the other leg nearest the edge,dangle off the side of the bed until you feel a stretch through the front and inside of your hip. Turn yourself around on the bed and repeat for other hip.
 
Hamstrings - lie on your back, reach for a towel, scarf or resistance band, place it under your foot, and do a straight leg raise (keeping your shoulders relaxed) feel the stretch at the back of your leg and flex your foot towards you). Hold for 15-20 seconds. Repeat for the other leg.
 
For your back.  
Child's pose. Kneel down on the bed, sit your bottom down on the back of your calves and slowly reach your outstretched arms forward and slide them away from you on the bed, trying to keep your bottom on your calves. breathe deeply and relax into the stretch.
Cat and Cow. kneel on the bed, placing knees hip width apart and hands on the bed directly under shoulders, back flat, tilt your head up to look towards the ceiling while dipping arching your back, hold the stretch then lower your head while pushing your back upwards towards the ceiling, hold the stretch. Repeat.
 
Presentation and Self care - 
Painting nails, doing hair and make-up for zoom calls, plucking nasal hair, spraying on a bit of deodorant (if you have had complaints), laying out the day's outfits (change of pyjamas, socks, or if venturing out, other appropriate clothing)
WARNING: you will have to get out of bed again for this.
 
After all that work and effort, you must be exhausted so relax and try some of the following...
 
Leisure Pursuits

• Yoga - Yes I understand that for some, this can be considered a leisure activity. 
• Meditating, or in reality, staring out of the window at the appalling weather and being grateful that you don't have to commute into work. You may be also fondly remembering past holidays and planning new ones that you know will be postponed. 
• Reading a book about other people doing interesting things out of their beds. 
• Knitting or crocheting blankets for your workstation. 
• Watching endless box sets then talking about them on the phone to the friends you used to see in person. 
• Playing games on your phone and feeling guilty that you're not doing something more productive.
• Making a list of jobs that need actioning when you eventually get out of bed.
• Planning meals for the week and wondering how much weight you've put on.
• Online shopping (for aforementioned meals, bed snacks, leisure wear and bedroom decor items to make your 24/7 environment as delightful as possible).
• Eating the food you have ordered for breakfast, lunch and dinner.

Bed Hygiene - IMPORTANT

• Brushing crumbs from sheets - Thankfully can be carried out from bed.
• Removing stray socks from bottom of bed - kick out with foot (beware of cramping).
• Emptying and re-filling hot water bottle and checking for leaks WARNING: you will have to get out of bed for this but you can do some stretches or balance on one leg while waiting for the kettle to boil.
• Changing bed linen once a week (Yes really) - WARNING: you will have to get out of bed again for this and may have to lie down again after the exertion.
• Vacuum cleaning and turning your mattress (What??). See below 'Fact'

 
Fact: In 1988 a groundbreaking study found that by switching an uncomfortable old bed to a lovely new one meant an extra 42 minutes of sleep! So if you've still got a job and can afford a new mattress go for it. If you haven't, try giving it a hoover and flipping it over (knees bent, core engaged to protect your back). BINGO! Like new.  
 
I think I need a lie down after all that typing... zzzz
 
* for censorship and health and safety reasons I am omitting an extremely popular cardio activity often carried out in bed. 
 
If you have any questions about stretches, cramps or any aches and pains, Tessa can be reached via tessaglovermassage@gmail.com or on 07966 473738.
  Tessa Glover
ISRM/BTEC (Level 5) Professional Diploma 
Clinical Sport and Remedial Massage Therapy
www.tessaglovermasssage.com
 07966 473738
 

It may be a while yet but the early signs heralding the end of winter are beginning to show themselves. Spring bulbs are pushing through the soil and catkins are dangling from the trees. For most of us these are uplifting very early signs of spring, this year more eagerly awaited and welcomed than ever.  But for hayfever sufferers the joy is tempered. Hayfever can take the pleasure out of a day in the sun, limiting activities and for some severely impacting on quality of life causing considerable misery. Symptoms can begin as early as March and treatment is often more effective when started before, hence this early post, ahead of the season.
Seasonal and Perennial

According to the Met Office, who publish a pollen forecast along with other useful information on hayfever, tree pollen allergies generally start from late March running to mid-May, grass has from May until July and weed pollens run from the end of June to September. The UkAllergy website is also a useful source and lists trees and plants by species. People with allergies to one or more of these pollen types have hayfever or seasonal allergic rhinitis.  Those with allergies to other sources such as house dust mites, mould or animal dander which often persist throughout the year have perennial allergic rhinitis. The symptoms are similar for both types of allergic rhinitis.
Symptoms

• Runny or blocked, itchy nose
• Sneezing
• Excess mucus
• Blocked, inflamed, painful sinuses
• Red, sore, itchy, streaming eyes

Treatment Options
Many people rely on antihistamines along with nasal steroid sprays and eye drops to relieve the symptoms of hayfever and for more severe symptoms immunotherapy may be an option.  However, not everyone is comfortable taking medication and all have side effects. Antihistamines, the most widely used treatment, can leave you feeling drowsy, sometimes with dizziness and headaches, and they dry the mucous membranes thickening the mucus and often causing greater congestion.
Acupuncture can help to reduce the impact of allergic rhinitis (seasonal and perennial) without the side effects. It is especially good at relieving nasal and sinus symptoms, most effectively as a treatment before symptoms begin but is also effective in reducing symptoms once they have started. A review of 13 research studies which included 2365 people with allergic rhinitis found acupuncture to be a safe and efficacious treatment improving their quality of life.

What else can you do to help?
Reducing exposure The most effective way to help is to reduce exposure to the pollen or other allergen.
For Seasonal Pollen Allergies:

• Check pollen counts and limit time outside on high days
• Keep windows closed on high pollen count days (Covid permitting!)

• Wear a sunhat with a brim and sunglasses
• Smear some vaseline around the rim of your nostrils to trap some of the pollen
• Wearing a mask may help - wash it regularly

• Wash face and hands (heard that before somewhere?) after being outside
• Shower before bed
• Wash clothes regularly after wearing them outside
• Limit line drying of clothes and bedding especially on high pollen days.

For Perennial Allergies (usually in the home):

• Use a vacuum cleaner with a HEPA-filter
• Use a HEPA air filter to clean the air
• House dust mite allergy: Vacuum bedding daily and wash regularly.
• Mould spore allergy: Deal with any damp areas that encourage mould growth
• Pets: Reduce contact with pets, easier said than done if you live with them! Their coats and saliva can both cause allergies, so reducing licking and, for dogs, regularly bathing can help. Poodles have lower allergy coats than other dogs.

Other measures

• Avoid or limit wheat, dairy and sugar which can all encourage mucus
• Use a Neti pot to flush nasal passages with saline (research)

• Add Spirulina to your diet (research)
  
• Add probiotics to your diet (research)

I will be back to offering face to face treatment on March 9th.  You can book online via West Norwood Therapies or contact me directly.
 
Best wishes,
 
Philippa
 
07941 674792
info@psacupuncture.co.uk

The idea of shame as an impediment to self-care has been niggling at me for a while. I wonder how much our ideas of what we ‘should’ be doing get in the way of what we really want to do and what we feel is a justifiable use of our time. I wonder how much we sacrifice ways we can nurture ourselves for the ‘greater good’ of work, family and duty and I wonder how much of a negative impact this has on our lives, and those around us, that we don’t always see.
When I talk about ‘self-care’ I am talking about things that nurture our bodies, minds and spirits. The things we love doing, things that make us come alive. Self-care is the things that nourish us. Self-care can be exercise, nutrition and meditation. It can also be music, art, creating something, playing with a pet, talking with a close friend.

For me, the exercise, nutrition and meditation side of things are easier to get to. This is because my personal version of shame means that for me to feel worthy I must be ‘healthy’. But it took an outsider view from my husband when he told me a couple of years ago “I’m scared the mornings you don’t do yoga” to recognise that the value in taking time for myself extended beyond just me looking after myself, that it had a knock on impact on the rest of my family and life.

I used to feel a lot of shame, too, around the good feelings that came from looking after myself in this way. I felt good and then felt ashamed that I felt good – life is meant to be hard, I’m meant to strive, I have responsibilities, I can’t be relaxed and happy??! So this led to spirals in how I responded and the ‘healthy’ behaviours became undermined by excessive consumption of sugar or alcohol or I just wouldn’t make a positive choice and self-sabotage myself.  

Two years later, now that my own self care is a priority in my daily life, I don’t have these battles. My husband doesn’t have to be scared the mornings I don’t do yoga because if I haven’t it’s probably because I have done something else nurturing or I know I will find the time elsewhere for it. It’s not so pressured and the overall benefits of making this a priority mean I don’t have the same level of desperation around it, I don’t need to escape regular life so much and I don’t have the same shame triggered in me to knock me off course. I am more resilient.  

To get to this point I had to spend time with that shame that trapped me. The shame that told me that I wasn’t good enough and that my time wasn’t only worthwhile if it was spent slogging on something or doing something for someone else. We all have our own shame triggers but there are common themes. Shame and vulnerability expert Brene Brown says “shame drives two main tapes: ‘never good enough’ and ‘who do you think you are’”. Both of these resonate for me and are shackles that still restrict me, but they don’t have the same power that they used to have.

And now the next layer of freedom I am discovering is that I am now more able to move toward the things that I really want to do but aren’t as immediately ‘justifiable’ in my personal shame-frame of reference. I am spending time creatively, for the joy and fun of it – I still feel guilty about this and about choosing these solitary and ‘aimless’ ways to spend my time. I had to fight myself using the word ‘indulgent’ in this description!

We can’t let go of all of these other things – my family, my work and paying the bills are all vital to me – but maybe we can ease up on the limitations we place on ourselves in honour of these if we can face the idea that perhaps its more than the reality of those getting in the way, that perhaps it’s our relationship with them and our relationship with ourselves that needs some attention first. And perhaps if we can do that then these things we are making the sacrifices for will become richer because of it.

Over the past few years I’ve been working on letting go of a competitive streak in myself. This streak has a strong genetic influence and is not entirely unhealthy – it has helped me carve my own path, to meet interesting people and try interesting things, to build a career and business, to keep learning and growing and setting my sights high and far. It has given me ambition and for a long time I was grateful for that.

But I have learned that ‘ambition’ is far from a happy state and indeed is a barrier to wholehearted living and any sort of internal peace and contentedness.

The tool that has helped me shine a light on my relationship to competitiveness is yoga and, in particular, yin yoga. The irony is that it was my competitive streak that held my attention to yin yoga – proof that nothing is ever ‘good’ or ‘bad’, the richness lies in the ambiguity and dualities.

The first yin yoga class I did was called ‘deep tissue stretch’ and it was with Andrea Kwiatkowski on Movement for Modern Life, a blessing in the form of a subscription platform that has improved my life a gazillion fold with excellent teaching and ability to have daily classes for all moods and needs. I liked the sound of this class that would reach into areas ‘like a massage’ and looked forward to the results.

It was tough! I struggled to find ease in many of the poses and the idea of holding them for 2-5 minutes was new to me. Andrea held my attention with her acknowledgement that ‘you might find this quite a frustrating practice’ – so I understood that it wasn’t just me and I stayed with it.

I gradually learned to back off, to ease away from ‘the edge’ as it is referred to in yin and to approach each pose in a softer way. I learned that this allowed the release I needed to go further – that yielding in my striving led to the yielding my body was craving, that easing off my effort allowed me to find much more progress and development in the work I was doing with this practice.

My physical yoga practice, known in yoga as asana and how we often understand ‘yoga’ generally, is my training ground for life and a touchstone that helps me understand who and where I am and what needs to change and how that change can come about in my life off the mat. So these lessons of yin, of lessening the effort, of not pushing so hard or trying to override where you already are, of going with rather than against and of listening acutely and – importantly – staying with what arises became my pillars of life. My benchmark for ‘success’ has become more about how it feels and what comes out of it for my growth rather than any external validation or acceptance.

Of course this doesn’t happen overnight, I am still on this journey of listening and adapting and learning and I see it as a lifelong journey. As is the other side of the coin, the letting go of what others think and the doubt of whether I am ‘good enough’ for my place in the world.

Competitiveness may be a fun and helpful trait for many and in many circumstances. I love watching an exciting game of rugby or 100m sprint and that wouldn’t be the same without the competitive spirit. But when it is part of your life to remove you from the here and now, to validate yourself and to make you push when perhaps pushing isn’t right, then it is not healthy.

At this time of year when we set ourselves targets and insist we must be ‘better’ this year, may we have the self-compassion to approach this with gentle discipline and kind self-talk. My goal is to commit to things that appeal to me, to follow my path and grow every day without force and allow adaptation and change when I meet resistance. Happy new year :-)